LESSONS FROM SOPHOMORE YEAR (BY REBECCA FROM HOWARD UNIVERSITY)

My sophomore year of college has given me some of the best things about my college experience. I did a lot, I laughed a lot, and I have had some once in a lifetime experiences. Along the way, I learned some valuable lessons.

1. Say yes to everything.

Last summer, I read Shonda Rhimes’ Year of Yes, a guide to “How to Dance It Out, Stand In the Sun and Be Your Own Person” given through stories of Shonda getting out of her own way. After reading it, I decided that I wanted my own “Year of Yes.”  I have been afforded many amazing opportunities this year, many of them out of my comfort zone, by getting out of my own way. Saying "yes" has led me to my first internship, shaking hands with some of the most powerful people in my industry, doing community work in Sint Maarten for free, being able to have all-access to the set of MTV’s Wild n’ Out and planning a conference. Extraordinary things happen when you say yes. Try it.

giphy.com

2.  Stay ready, so you don’t have to get ready.

When I said yes to everything, a lot of the times I had to make a last minute decision.  For example, when I went to New York and was on the set of Wild n’ Out, I had a day and a half to prepare, an a couple of hours to make my decision. Lucky for me, I am responsible enough to have money set aside for opportunities that come up.  If I didn’t plan ahead, I would have missed out on this once in a lifetime opportunity.

My tips for staying ready: keep your personal brand up-to-date, have a passport ready, have some money set aside that you can only touch when it comes to opportunities, eliminate baggage (mental blocks, emotional blocks, attachment to the physical, etc,) and have a good attitude!  

giphy.com

3. We all need somebody to lean on.

giphy.com

I have the worst case of “strong black woman syndrome.”  I hate asking for help and depending on people. I had a bad habit of acting like I am all I have. This semester, I learned the importance of leaning on my support system and understanding that no one can get through life all on their own. I have a supportive family, friends and people in my community that look out for me, pray for me and pick me up when I fall. This year, I have built a tribe of like-minded friends that care about me and want me to win. I have built relationships with professors and adults in my community that can offer guidance and insights. When I call home, I actually let them know what’s going on with me. No one has gotten to where they are alone, and getting over asking for help has been crucial to my success and well-being.  

4. I am not my achievements.

giphy.com

My freshman year of college until the middle of my second semester of this year, I had a huge identity crisis.  In high school, my identity was “the smart black kid.” I came to Howard, and everyone was “the smart black kid.” For so long I had defined myself by my resume, that when others had a longer resume than I did, and were doing more than me in college, I thought I had no value. I went to therapy for a good portion of my time in college, and learned that the root of many of my issues was that I defined myself by being #blackexcellence, that I did not know who I was outside of that scope. I am honored that others see me as a role model, but being #goals was taking a toll on me. I was calculating my every move, who I was seen with, where I went and how I spoke all for the sake of living up to this image others had of me was exhausting. I learned that I owe no one any part of me and started living without questioning me every move. Exploring myself outside of that lens is an ongoing journey for me, but learning this lesson has been a weight lifted off my shoulders.

5. You create your reality.

This lesson is the most important lesson of all in my opinion. At the end of last summer, going into the beginning of sophomore year, I was really into studying the Law of Attraction (your thoughts become your reality). The idea that you can create your reality was really intriguing to me, so I tried it. I journaled and visualized things I wanted for myself and it worked. Everything I wanted came true, many things exceeded my expectations. I visualized supportive friends, I visualized adventure, I visualized travel and I visualized opportunities. I practiced this throughout the school year and it worked every time. Remember, faith without work is dead, so the Law of Attraction will only work if you do.

giphy.com

I see the purpose and the lesson in everything, so I have been afforded so many lessons this school year, but here are my top five!

What did you learn this school year? Tell me by tweeting me @the_rebeccaj!




Rebecca is a rising junior at Howard University from Virginia Beach, Va. She's majoring in Journalism and minoring in Graphic Design. She loves reading and writing. Check out her website https://www.therebeccajohnson.com/ and follow her on Twitter @the_rebeccaj and email nerdynaturals@gmail.com if you're interested in contributing.